Snips

Sometimes, to protect ourselves, we close ourselves off from a person we'rein a relationship with. Our body may be present, but we're not. We're notavailable to participate in the relationship. We shut down.Sometimes, it is appropriate and healthy to shut down in a relationship. We may legitimately need some time out. Sometimes it is self-defeating to close ourselves off in a relationship.To stop being vulnerable, honest, and present for another person can put anend to the relationship. The other person can do nothing in the relationshipwhen we are gone. Closing ourselves makes us unavailable to that relationship.It is common to go through temporary periods of closing down in a relationship. But it is unhealthy to make this an ongoing practice. It may be one of our relationship-sabotaging devices.Before we close down, we need to ask ourselves what we are hoping to accomplish by shutting down. Do we need some time to deal? To heal? To grow?To sort through things? Do we need time out from this relationship? Or are we reverting to our old ways - hiding, running, and terminating relationships because we are afraid we cannot take care of ourselves in any other way?Do we need to shut down because the other person truly isn't safe, is manipulating, lying, or acting out addictively or abusively? Are we shutting down because the other person has shut down and we no longer want to be available?Shutting down, shutting off, closing ourselves and removing our emotional presence from a relationship is a powerful tool. We need to use it carefully and responsibly. To achieve intimacy and closeness in a relationship, we need to be present emotionally. We need to be available.God, help me be emotionally present in the relationships I choose to be in.Melody Beattie ©


How can God work in all these unseen realms at the same time, being fully available to each of us? We simply cannot get our minds around this mystery, and the truth is, we're not meant to know. Who would want a God so easily understood? When we embrace, instead of dissecting mystical experiences, we become more in tune with this infinite, loving Presence we call God.
Mary Manin Morrissey

AA Thought for the Day / A spiritual awakening soon came to mean trying each day to be a little more thoughtful, more considerate, a little more courteous to those with whom I came in contact. / AA, p. 356

When you stop jumping ahead, when you stop looking back, it is amazing how effective you can be right where you are. Worrying about the future or regretting the past will drain energy away from you. Set aside those futile efforts and put the power of your being into being where you are. Focus on the moment at hand, at being your best right here and now. Plan for the future, to be sure, but don't let your considerable energy be drained off by it. Be aware of where you are, and of where your focus lies. If you catch yourself drifting off into the anxieties of the past or the future, gently pull yourself back into the present moment. There is so much you can accomplish by doing what you can, when you can. Now is your moment to live. Give your attention and your energy to where you are. Make the very best use of each moment as it comes along by living it to its fullest. Focus on being where you are, and you'll be in a great and positive place indeed. Ralph S. Marston

If we go through life fighting, opposing, resisting, arguing, we are bound to meet with many obstacles and likely become so occupied fighting them that we lose sight of our real objective. If we are always getting steeled for the next opposition or trouble, we can expect plenty of it. / Raymond Holliwell

“An avoidance of true communication is tantamount to a relinquishment of my self-being; if I withdraw from it I am betraying not only the other but myself.” Karl Jaspers

Our outward behavior is just a reflection of our inner balance or our out of balance.John-Roger


"Life is either a grand adventure or nothing.”
Helen Keller


namaste...